Life is so much fun. . .just doing the normal things, like cleaning house, working in the yard, playing with my daughter, cooking dinner for my husband - I last night figured out that the life I was so desperately trying to escape from is the very thing I want and love! How bizarre is that?
Without pills, I can just be me and I like being me. I've noticed that I talk a whole lot, laugh even more and actually feel happy inside, naturally happy that is and not synthetically loaded. . .today there is a very high probability that I won't take a pill. . .plus I have my awesome meeting to look forward to tonight and so there's an additional chance I won't take a pill tonight either. . .what a concept; what freedom!!
Of course, I am only 17 days clean and am still very guarded about just how conniving this disease is. . .I am not staring too deeply into my past though and just glancing back now and again, mainly to ensure it doesn't sneak up on me and attack when I least expect it. . .always cunning; always baffling and oh so powerful!! But guess what, so am I, today anyway!!
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