i feel so horrible today

well i have my first altrasound tommrow because i had some bleeding and im on the worst drug in the world subutex my poor baby im so sorry for putting you through this i hope everything turns out ok i dont want the first thing you feel when you come into this world is pain im sorry im sososo sorry i wish this was planed and i would of got clean off of these pills i will never touch another drug again but if i stop taking subutex it will kill you and make me very very sick i dont know what to do all i know is i have never loved anything or anyone so much in my life and i havent even met you yet