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HIV Prevention (Expert Forum)
Risky???
Answered by
University of Washington
Seattle - WA
This forum is limited to prevention of HIV and to safe sex in general. If you believe you might have been exposed to HIV and want help to judge your risk, would like advice about HIV testing, or have questions about the effectiveness of condoms or the risks associated with specific sexual practices, this is the site for you.
IMPORTANT
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No questions will be accepted on the treatment of HIV/AIDS or its complications, viral load, and similar topics. If you have questions about a specific STD other than HIV/AIDS, please visit the STD Forum. Questions that do not pertain to the above topics will be removed from the forum.
If you have not done so, please review other threads in our archives for questions similar to yours and Dr. Handsfield's replies. Questions that duplicate other frequent ones, for which abundant replies exist, and that have little educational value for other forum users, will be DELETED WITHOUT RESPONSE. YOUR PAYMENT WILL NOT BE REFUNDED. The most common examples of such questions are those about low risk exposures to HIV, such as oral sex, condom- protected intercourse hand-to-genital exposure, and nonsexual contact with possibly infected blood or body fluids as well as symptoms of early HIV infection.
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Risky???
by jay4691, Aug 30, 2008 11:58AM
I am a 39 yo male. Married. Have had a few affairs in the past. Had recent one nighter on biz trip. I was at a resort on biz and i met 2 people who happened to be friends on vacation (not my friends but each others - they are female in their early 50s). (My wife was along and in our room asleep)
I had a few drinks with them, and took the 54 yo to her room. We had intercourse and kissed (no oral).
I used a condom which came off as we changed positions - the end was hanging out. I put a fresh one on. She even offered me one of her own, but I had a second one. We changed positions a few more times and on one occasion the condom came off again - same as the first time. I was very hard (recreational viagra) and simply opend the same condom up real wide (to avoid her "dna") and stuck my penis back in the condom. We had sex for about another 5 minutes. I finished. I went to get dressed and the woman said you should shower before you go back to your room. I did. I went back to the room feeling really guilty. (Since this is a past behavior, I have decided to see a counselor to try to stop this behavior in the future.) The 54 yo was had the end of her period happening - light blood. I have a mildy sore throat - I think from my recurring allergies, and the nasel spray I use and the snoring at night since I am stuffy at night.
What is my risk here?
Should I get tested?
If I get tested how long do I have to wait?
What type of test would I have?
I had a few drinks with them, and took the 54 yo to her room. We had intercourse and kissed (no oral).
I used a condom which came off as we changed positions - the end was hanging out. I put a fresh one on. She even offered me one of her own, but I had a second one. We changed positions a few more times and on one occasion the condom came off again - same as the first time. I was very hard (recreational viagra) and simply opend the same condom up real wide (to avoid her "dna") and stuck my penis back in the condom. We had sex for about another 5 minutes. I finished. I went to get dressed and the woman said you should shower before you go back to your room. I did. I went back to the room feeling really guilty. (Since this is a past behavior, I have decided to see a counselor to try to stop this behavior in the future.) The 54 yo was had the end of her period happening - light blood. I have a mildy sore throat - I think from my recurring allergies, and the nasel spray I use and the snoring at night since I am stuffy at night.
What is my risk here?
Should I get tested?
If I get tested how long do I have to wait?
What type of test would I have?
Doctor's Answer
by H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D., Aug 30, 2008 12:12PM
, Aug 30, 2008 12:12PM
You say nothing about your partner and her lifestyle, and you don't say where you are. If you are in the US or other industrialized country and your partner is not a commercial sex worker, injection drug user, the partner of a bay/bi man, etc, there is no realistic chance she has HIV. (Since you're worried, you could ask her, both about whether she has HIV or is at particular risk.) Accordingly, it is unlikely there was any HIV risk, even if sex had been entirely unprotected. In any case, your sex in fact was protected. Even though it was not ideal to re-use the same condom, the chance of transmission -- even if she had HIV or an STD -- was near zero.
For these reasons, from as standpoint of medical considerations and risk assessment, you definitely do not need HIV testing. However, the tone of your question suggests your anxiety and guilt will make it difficult for you to rely on my advice alone, i.e. you likely are going to want to be tested for the psychological support you will gain from the negative test result. Also, every person who is sexually active outside a permanent, mutually monogamous relationship should be tested for HIV from time to time, like every 1-2 years. Since that applies to you, this seems a good time to do it, since it's on your mind. But not because of this particular event.
So go ahead and get tested about 6 weeks after the event. (You'll find many sources that advise 3 months, but that is a conservative, somewhat outdated recommendation. it really isn't necessary to wait that long with the current standard HIV tests.) A standard HIV antibody test is all that is needed; your own doctor (or your local health department STD clinic) will know what test to do. While you're at it, testing for other STDs (syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia) would be a good idea at the same time.
Also, have that conversation with your partner about her risks. You might find she is just as concerned as you are and will appreciate it when you reassure her about your generally low risk for HIV.
In the meantime, don't lose sleep over this. The chance you caught HIV is zero for all practical purposes.
Regards--- HHH, MD
For these reasons, from as standpoint of medical considerations and risk assessment, you definitely do not need HIV testing. However, the tone of your question suggests your anxiety and guilt will make it difficult for you to rely on my advice alone, i.e. you likely are going to want to be tested for the psychological support you will gain from the negative test result. Also, every person who is sexually active outside a permanent, mutually monogamous relationship should be tested for HIV from time to time, like every 1-2 years. Since that applies to you, this seems a good time to do it, since it's on your mind. But not because of this particular event.
So go ahead and get tested about 6 weeks after the event. (You'll find many sources that advise 3 months, but that is a conservative, somewhat outdated recommendation. it really isn't necessary to wait that long with the current standard HIV tests.) A standard HIV antibody test is all that is needed; your own doctor (or your local health department STD clinic) will know what test to do. While you're at it, testing for other STDs (syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia) would be a good idea at the same time.
Also, have that conversation with your partner about her risks. You might find she is just as concerned as you are and will appreciate it when you reassure her about your generally low risk for HIV.
In the meantime, don't lose sleep over this. The chance you caught HIV is zero for all practical purposes.
Regards--- HHH, MD
You are right about my anxiety and that is why i decided to see a "therapist" - I really do not need to put my marriage at risk, or my health. The hiv test will help with the anxiety, and the continuing therapy will work on the underlying guilt, and trying to not cheat again.
Thanks for your reassurance.
One last question - Is there a test that can be taken sooner than 6 weeks?
I still have a nagging sore throat from about 5 days ago. Scratchy, no swollen nodes. I keep looking in my mouth for thrush (ocd...). Tonight I noticed a little more white matter on my tongue, and a small (smaller than a thumbtack head) sized white patch on the inside of my mouth. I over course looked at pics on the internet which made me think thrush. No fever, no night sweats. Any worries?
Thanks for your support.
AIDS, not early HIV infecion. Don't worry about it.